You can choose happiness, leave sadness behind. It is a challenge, it does take practice. One easy way to get started is to smile. Even a fake, phoney smile will begin the process of empowerment. Being stuck in old habits and ways can take some time to break but smiling shows your intent. It will get easier and easier.
“Worry will not add a single day to your life” said Jesus. Worry leads to stress and can shorten your life. Telling your worries to a good friend can give you a new perspective on what you fear, offering a rational approach to what are often vague fears.
The best way to become more positive is to change negative self talk to positive self talk. This does not change the laws of physics but it can help you get a more uplifting view on difficult issues. Instead of saying to yourself or to others “I’m fat” say “ I’m my perfect weight for my body type”. It won’t make you slim but it reminds you that there is a very wide spectrum of body types. In doing this I have changed the context from “I’m not good enough” to “I am what I am, take it or leave it!”. It will have an effect on you living a happy life.
Forgiveness allows you to drop the weight of a past hurt by distancing an identity from it. You no longer have the association of blame and therefore can let go of the experience. Feelings of anger and revenge arise when someone refuses to forgive. These emotions will keep repeating themselves and even accentuating themselves until forgiveness neutralises the emotion associated with whatever event caused the hurt in the first place.
There is nothing more empowering than gratefulness. It can transform seeming poverty into great wealth, seeming affliction into health and narrow unhappiness into expansive happiness. Of all the practices in this list it is the most powerful, quickest and easiest to implement. You can exercise gratefulness hundreds of times a day without making tremendous mental effort. Begin now by looking straight in front of your eyes thinking about what you can be grateful for. After this exercise you will see what I mean.
Money is nice. It represents security, options, even luxury and comfort. But it can’t buy happiness. By concentrating on what you have and being grateful for that you harness the power of non attachment to outcomes.
With friends you have support and strength greater than one single person. You have sounding boards, advice and love. They are one of the most important investments in your future you can make.
Vegetating in front of depressing TV and slobbing out on pizza and ice cream may fill a hole in the short term but insisting on value time like going to the gym, volunteering for a charitable cause or surprising a friend or family member with a present or message of love is far more fulfilling and more effective in making happy people.
You cannot know the life path of someone else, you cannot know their history from their perspective even if you know all the facts of their life so judging them as more successful or less successful than you is fatuous. Glamorous models can have terrible body images, sports stars can be lapping up the adulation of the crowd and then go home to awful depression. You can easily see this by looking at the successful people who you may have envied who have later committed suicide.
Exhibiting kindness makes you feel good and elevates you in the eyes of others. Even if they don’t mention it, those who see your acts of kindness will perceive you as powerful and prosperous since you have the power to increase the happiness of others.
Some say the best things in life are free. Don’t know about that but you can take joy in the little things, like the heart warming smile of a child or the park on a warm day makes for happy people. Its very availability is its joy.
There have been whole books written on goal setting, but simply put, setting goals helps you organise your time. Goals have to be specific so that you can assess where you are in terms of reaching the goal. Achieving a goal is one of life’s great pleasures, so feel free to break down your big goals into smaller more easily achievable mini-goals.
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